Universes: The many lovers of Samantha Carter
by heffermonkey
Summary: There are many universes, and within them, Samantha Carter has many different lovers.


Title: Universes: The many lovers of Samantha Carter

Rating: PG

Summary: The many universes, and many loves of Samantha Carter

A/N : Written on a whim because I had so many pairing ideas for Sam and couldn't decide on one to particularly write about.

* * *

He shouldn't be so inviting, so addictive. He's dangerous and cunning and nothing good will come of it. It's a small voice in her head that is telling her to not fall into this trap once more, to not give into his charms. But Ba'al already has her under his spell and she refuses to resist. His eyes are mesmerising, his touch electrifying and his kisses are rough yet tender, caressing and possessive. His voice sends shivers along every nerve, like they seep into every part of her as he whispers shockingly erotic words that should bring a blush to her cheeks. But she's already leading him invitingly to the bed with a knowing smile, nothing surprises her about him now.

Not until he whispers hoarsely against her skin at that crucial moment of pure bliss and ecstasy, words that say I love you. That she wasn't expecting, that changes everything.

Though she feels the same, she can't bring herself to say them back. That would finalise the betrayal.

...

It's like it's crept up on them and neither of them even noticed until they were so deep into it, it's impossible to crawl out. Suddenly they can't seem to operate without one another and movie nights end up as sleep overs because they talk into the early hours of morning every time about everything and anything. It takes a few bottles of wine to loosen them up enough to admit their feelings, but Daniel waits until they are stone cold sober before he kisses her. She thinks it should be weird kissing Daniel, her best friend, her go too guy, but instead it's like this is what's been missing the whole time in their relationship. They take it slow because neither of them wants this to be a mistake, they won't lose out on a eight year friendship on the chance this could be something more. But it's only a few months before they sleep together and again Sam thinks it should have been awkward but she has to admit it's the best sex bar none that she's ever had. Daniel asks her to move in and suddenly their best friends with the added bonus of being in love.

...

Teal'c has never been one to mix words or even use many to express himself. So when he tells her in his no nonsense manner that he's attracted to her, Sam feels flattered but isn't exactly sure how to deal with it. Still, she tells herself that it isn't as if she hasn't looked at Teal'c before 'in that way' and it would certainly be an interesting sort of relationship. It still takes her a few conversations with Janet to reassure her that even though he's an alien doesn't mean they can't date. Teal'cs her rock, always has been, but it isn't like they'd really talked about stuff. So that's how they start, talking. The talking paves the way for deeper attractions and soon Sam finds out that Jaffa aren't just magnificent warriors in battle.

...

Jonas smiles all of the time. It should have been annoying but Sam loves how he takes everything in about her world without a bat of his eyes. It's as if, through him, she gets to see a different take on things she takes for granted. His love of food means she gets to indulge a side of her not often let loose, she drags out her mothers old recipe book and whips up various meals with varying degrees of success. Jonas doesn't seem to care though, he eats everything set in front of him with his usual grin. After all, he doesn't know what it should really taste like.

But it's when he finds out about cocktails and shots that things get interesting. Jack took him to a bar and taught him about tequila and invariably let his mouth loose on the various ways of licking salt and sucking lemon. But it's Sam Jonas wants to try these techniques out on and who is she to disappoint that smiling, alluring face. She tries not to shiver when he licks her neck of the salt just put there, or how his eyes don't leave hers when he takes his shot. The way his lips wrap around the piece of lemon she's been holding for herself, brushing against her fingertips. There's a beat when the smile isn't on his lips anymore, he's staring at her with a meaningful look. But as he leans in to kiss her, she sees the smile again, bright and inviting in his eyes.

...

It's always strange and confusing with Martouf. It's as if the feelings aren't part of her yet they are. Somehow, despite not existing anymore, Jolinar has left a residual presence that rears itself when Martouf is around. Sam feels how intimate they'd been without even touching him, knows the kind of lover he'd been without having been with him. When he kisses her it's familiar and strange all at the same time. It un-nerves her and she wants to stop, she doesn't want him, but something pressures her to go with it, like two forces inside her fighting for control. The symbiote may have gone but it's hold over her would never truly disappear and Sam knows, around Martouf, she'll always be the weaker force, she'll always lose.

When he leaves she feels relief, but she waits in anticipation for their next meeting.

...

Cameron's an old boyfriend so the history is there already. But they're comfortable around each other despite the years and it's like they are back in high school and the feelings never really ended. They just ended up moving on to different colleges and different lives without ever really thinking that maybe what they had could have lasted longer. That they both ended up in the air force, that they both ended up becoming soldiers in a war against the galaxy and alien bad guys seems too weird a co-incidence. Cameron flirts like he's still eighteen and Sam was never able to resist his charms and falls for him all over again. Together they go out daily to fight the bad guys and together they go home and find solace and safety in each others arms.

...

It's gotten to the point they don't even realise they are doing it anymore. They've spent so long avoiding the subject and the idea of it, burying feelings so deep they don't remember if the feelings were genuine or made up. Things have become awkward, they can't be in the same room with one another, alone, before the tension sets in. This should have been a wake up call, but they continue on like nothing is weird because it's what they've always done.

When Jack says he's moving on from the SGC to a new job in Washington, it should have become their time. But neither of them bring the subject up, it's been buried too deep that even they don't know what their real feelings are anymore. Jack leaves and they're both lost. He calls from Washington from time to time and on occasion she makes the trip to see him, along with Daniel and Teal'c, never alone.

She accepts the post to Atlantis without a second thought because they already live miles apart, why not light years in different galaxies None of it will make a difference. They both ignore the empty feeling not being in the same galaxy at one another that comes upon them. Sam returns but not to him, she jumps around from place to place like a lost soul unable to find any resting place. But no-body notices because she's always been practised in the façade of normal. She's done it for years now. Taking the job on the Hammond is like taking on Atlantis, she still gets to travel from place to place, never settling long enough to have to face how empty her life really is without him. She hasn't got time for what ifs of the past.

So she's surprised when one day he just appears at her door, she's been earth bound for a few months as the Hammond gets some much needed repairs after a recent battle with the growing forces of the Lucian Alliance. He garbles something about being in the neighbourhood though he lives a plane ride away. As always it's strained and awkward and they sit in silence for all of a minute before the forced conversation begins before it gets embarrassing. All the years they've known each other, they've never been able to really talk normal, every day stuff.

He says he's retiring, again and Sam isn't much surprised. The job in Washington has changed him and she doesn't think he likes what he'd been becoming. She doesn't think she likes who he's become. He's lost some of his spark, his essence, he's a good man and a damn good officer, but the job just asks him to sacrifice too much of who he is. Sam doesn't tell him this but gives a nod in agreement of his descision. She's sure Daniel and Teal'c will be glad too. Perhaps they'll get the old Jack back.

Jack says he's going to go to the cabin once the 'retirement' has been made official, thinks maybe he'll stay there for a long while. A few months perhaps, it's coming into spring and the weather will hold. Sam agrees it's a good idea.

The silence sets in again because they are so practised in not talking about exactly what they want to talk about, what they should be talking about. Eventually, before the awkwardness gets so uncomfortable Sam will have to make up some excuse and get him to leave he asks her to go with him. Just three words, come with me, and Sam doesn't even have to think about the answer, just says, okay, right off the bat without pause or consideration or care of what else might be in store for her.

It's like the small exchange has released something, because suddenly the awkwardness isn't there anymore. Just a moment of clarity and certainty. If there wasn't paperwork to organise Sam was sure Jack would have just told her to grab her stuff and jump in the van right there and then. A few days later though she gets a call from him wondering if she really wants to stay in charge of the Hammond and much as she loves the job, she's sure he's already started on the paperwork to get a new captain for the ship. She doesn't complain. Jack can still pull a few strings before he retires and he does.

But it isn't until she's driving up to the cabin, having arranged to meet him there that she feels like maybe she's in a good place right now. It feels right to be there, just the two of them, eventually Daniel and Teal'c will visit and they'll have a week of being the four of them again. Pulling up she sits for a moment and holds her breath, exhales as Jack appears at the front door, two beers in hand and a look on his face that spells something like relief. Relief that she came, relief that he's not carrying so much responsibility around any more.

Relieved that they don't have to hide behind muted looks and buried feelings.

Sam gets out of the car, smile on her face. She knows just how he feels.


End file.
